In my experience, most of our perceived challenges or roadblocks when it comes to reaching a goal, actualizing a desire, etc., are the result of our own self-sabotage.
There are infinite ways that we get in our own way but I’ve identified what I see most common in my work with my private nutrition clients. And if I’m being honest, are challenges that I’ve imposed on myself in one way or another over the years.
I view self-sabotage as a means of self-preservation; that means that we deliberately keep ourselves in a static zone of safety to reduce the potential for discomfort.
During my February Aligned Activation workshop, The Self-Sabotage Spiral, we’ll dissect three common self-sabotage diversions and deep dive into understanding why we default to them as well as explore some practical solutions to self-correct so that you can get out of your own damn way.
The workshop will be held live on Wednesday, February 2, 2022. The transmission will be approximately 44 minutes within a private Facebook group and the replay will be available immediately afterward. An accompanying workbook will be provided. The activation (investment) for my workshops are $44 but I do offer an early bird rate so keep an eye out!
I cannot want for you what you want for you more than you want it.
During a conversation with a client a few weeks ago, I made the comment that I have often felt that I want what she wants for herself more than she does.
For the record, I adore this client. I do want her to achieve what she desires so badly, and I have absolute faith that she is capable of it.
But over the course of our time together, it often seemed that I was dragging her instead of walking alongside her.
And to be frank, that’s not my job as a coach and mentor.
I am a portal for transformation.
However, if you want to be in my field and experience the fruition of whatever goals you have, the requirement is that you take the initiative to enter. And show up for yourself. Every. Single. Day.
I cannot do the work for you.
I can guide you, support you, steer you in the right direction, make recommendations, give you ideas, provide feedback, be your loudest cheerleader, and celebrate every win with you. But if I want it for you more than you do, it won’t work. Period.
I’m setting new boundaries with how I hold space for clients. My desire is to work with clients who are ALL IN.
I frequently get inquiries and messages from people who exclaim “I’m ready!” And then weeks pass without any action or further discussion. You’re either all the fuck in or not. There is no “I’m kind of ready” or “I think I’m ready but still on the fence about how ready I really am because life is crazy and I’m not sure and maybe next week, or next month, or in 2025 when my kid graduates high school will be better and then I’ll really be ready.”
I’ve worked with people who’ve said all the right things yet fail to follow through. I’ve had clients forget about their check-in appointments or get busy and not prioritize their commitment to themselves (and honor my time). I’ve witnessed every aspect of self-sabotage you can imagine.
My intention is not to be callous or without compassion. But it would be a disservice if I were to avoid administering a touch of tough love to trigger you a little bit.
If you have considered or are considering working with me, know that the requirement is going to be that you’re willing to prove that you’re all in.
Three life lessons I learned from raising ducklings this year.
I wanted a duck. One. Not three. But because I’m a “leap and the net will appear” type of gal, I often jump into things without preparing myself assuming that I’ll learn as I go.
This serves me pretty well for the most part. It keeps life interesting and my Mister on his toes. Ha!
Back in April, I was looking for chicks but chicks weren’t yet available at the feed store; ducklings were ample. I bought two. I figured if I was going to get one, a second one just made sense.
Unfortunately, one of the ducklings didn’t survive more than a week. I didn’t want the remaining one to be alone so back to the feed store I went for a replacement. There were two left. The clerk begged me to take both and informed me that they cannot be alone. They need to be in pairs or groups. He didn’t even charge me for it. I got a buy-one-get-one-free deal!
And that’s how I ended up with three ducks and three lessons.
The phrase “ducks in a row” is an idiom that basically means to have details in order, be well organized, prepared, or in proper position before embarking on a new project or undertaking.
I most certainly did not have my ducks in a row when I entered the feed store that fateful day in April. If I had waited based upon the technicality that I had no idea what I was doing, I would have missed out on a lot of joy over the past eight months.
I find it interesting that a natural characteristic of ducks is to walk in a row but slightly abreast. If you’ve never had the opportunity to observe ducks, they literally waddle around abreast with one another but slightly staggered. It’s quite comical. Their positioning is orderly without order, inline and misaligned, perfectly imperfect.
We often wait until the right time before we begin to do something. Waiting until things are in order, our schedules are clear, one project is complete before moving on to the next. The lesson I’ve extracted is that sometimes we need to leap before our ducks are in a row because frankly, they’ll never quite be inline.
Their cooperativeness is affected by my energy. Unlike chickens, ducks do not tuck themselves in for the night. My three are part-time free-range ducks so when we let them out, we have to physically go shoo them back into their coop before it gets dark. Or, if we get delayed, in the dark which is even more fun.
It has gotten a little easier as they’ve become better trained but there’s also some strategy involved. And, one of the strategies I’ve come to employ is approaching them with a demeanor that exudes calm and unruffled (no pun intended).
They can read my energy. I’ve gone out to put them away and in my own haste, have ended up unproductively chasing them around in circles as my frustration level rapidly rises. In turn, they become leerier of my intentions and get worked up. So I get more worked up and advance from frustration to agitation. They get even more defiant and I get more pissed. And then… it just keeps escalating.
I either have to walk away and come back later or send for reinforcement. (AKA Papa Rooster, my mister, who is the true keeper of our flock.)
Anyway, they are much more compliant when I tend to them when I’m intentional about my energy. Isn’t that the case in most situations? We have the power to choose how we respond and therefore, the outcome.
The net really will appear.
Any decision to do something comes with a learning curve. Preparing has its place and being proactive, instead of reactive, is a smart strategy a lot of the time.
But also, sometimes diving head-first into something forces you to rise up to meet the occasion. You can put one foot in front of the other and learn as you go. You can begin before you feel you’re ready. You can learn to trust your whims and that somehow, someway, everything will work out okay.
Sometimes you simply have to have unwavering trust and faith that the net will appear.
I’ve never been much of a fan of New Year’s resolutions. The act of resolving something typically stems from the desire to find a solution to a problem.
In the case of a person setting a New Year’s resolution, the root of desired change stems from the belief that there is something unsatisfactory – or wrong – about the person or their behaviors. And sure, some habits may be categorized as unfavorable but anytime we approach change from a place of self-deprecation, we are not setting ourselves up for success.
By definition, resolution means to make a firm decision to do, or not do, something. However, it doesn’t address the need for actual actions that align with what the desired outcome is.
You can make a decision to do something or not do something. To state a solution to a problem or problematic behavior is easy. But it doesn’t necessarily equate to change and that’s why I believe so many people are challenged in keeping their resolve.
Revolution on the other hand implies radical change as a byproduct of activity or movement designed to affect change. It also means in favor of a new system.
In order to evoke change, we have to be willing to actually change our behaviors. And the overtone of the word revolution elicits action and being in favor of new ways to do so. It’s not co-dependent upon feeling bad about ourselves but instead birthed from a place of self-love, excitement, and curiosity about what kind of radical change we can create.
That is my perception of it anyway and from my own experience, a more sustainable approach to achieving goals whether they begin at the start of a new year or on a Tuesday in the middle of May.
I practice what I preach and I invite you to consider this as we approach January 1: are you ready for radical change or are you going to settle for stating you have a solution to X but have no tangible steps to actually achieve it?
The core elements of Aligned Activation are intended to help navigate the nonlinear nuances of actualizing desires. If you’re looking for some support, my January workshop will be looking into the prioritization of priorities in relation to actualizing a goal or achievement.
Actualization of a goal hinges on one’s ability to filter thoughts, actions, feelings towards, etc., through the lens that correlates to the desired outcome.
I’m a protein forward practitioner. When I help my clients fine-tune their macronutrient ratios, protein is always the nutrient we target first and takes priority. We easily get enough fat and carbohydrates in our diets. Protein is another story.
If you’re unsure how much protein you should be consuming, and why, here’s a generalized summary of why protein is so important and how to determine your requirements.
First and foremost, proteins are the precursor to nearly every chemical process (think enzymes, antibodies, and peptide hormones which affect the endocrine system) and the building blocks for all tissues, organs, nerves, and muscles in the body.
Proteins and essential for digestion and detoxification. Proteins in the foods you consume actually trigger chemical reactions in your body to tell your digestive system what is needed to break down the foods you eat. If you’re consuming too little protein or not eating protein with every meal (or snack), your digestive system won’t operate optimally and you risk maximizing nutrient absorption.
Proteins improve satiety and increase thermogenesis. That means you’ll feel satisfied longer and you’ll burn more calories simply by eating more protein.
They rebuild tissues and are imperative for muscle growth and repair. Even if you’re not trying to “bulk up,” building muscle and staying strong later in life is vital. Sarcopenia (loss of muscle mass) is attributed to injuries in the elderly due to instability and weakness of the muscles and thus causing falls and other accidents.
Generally, you should aim to consume .75 to 1 gram of protein per pound of body weight. Bodybuilders and those really pushing to increase muscle mass for sport may increase higher, up to 1.2 grams per pound. If you’re trying to lose weight or are an athlete, protein requirements should be adjusted to meet individual factors. If overweight, generally, I’d recommend your protein intake, in grams, be roughly equal to your goal weight.
Customization is based on age, gender, activity level, caloric intake, digestive function, and goals.
The best complete sources of protein that contain all nine essential amino acids come from nutrient-dense whole foods: meat, fish, eggs, and some dairy products if tolerated by the individual. Whey protein is a supplement that should be used secondary to whole foods but a great option to bridge the gap when transitioning to higher protein intake.
Vegetable proteins from nuts, seeds, and vegetables count towards total protein consumption but do not contain all nine essential amino acids so make sure you’re eating a diverse array of foods for good overall health and adequate protein.
If getting enough protein is a challenge, this is my area of expertise. Reach out and we can create a plan to ensure you’re getting enough to meet (or meat, HA!) your needs.
I’m a huge advocate for the collection of data to better understand how the body is responding to dietary manipulation in tandem with fitness pursuits.
And, there is a wide spectrum of tools and resources available; the scale is simply one of them.
I believe that what we measure, we can better manage. We are better able to create our desired outcome when we have a clear understanding of the metrics. Where we begin, the collection of data through various modalities to monitor progress over time, and what that looks like in terms of the trajectory of where we are versus where we are headed are important aspects of the process of modifying body composition.
We so easily get fixated on one aspect of measurement that it becomes difficult to view the bigger picture.
With my private nutrition clients, I utilize a number of different tools for gauging progress depending on the client’s comfort level. Scale weight, measurements, and photographs are the most common ones because they are among the easiest.
I’ve also recommended body composition analysis, which is my favorite tool because the data is so in-depth but it’s not the most convenient option. (More on this below.)
For some clients, using other biomarkers such as overall feelings of wellbeing, improvement in sleep, consistent bowel movements, increased energy, etc. are used.
I’ve had clients use a garment to help keep track of their composition changes by monitoring how the clothing fits and feels each time they put it on. (I’m a fan of this one too! Getting reports from clients that something that previously didn’t fit, now does, is a powerful way to witness the needle moving forward!)
I find that clients that embrace using a variety of these tools have better results. And by better results, I’m not only talking about weight loss or muscle gain. Having a solid grasp on changes in the body based upon data is really empowering; knowledge is literally power!
As for me personally, I monitor my body composition via Bioelectrical Impedance Analysis (BIA) by InBody pretty infrequently because it’s not something that’s easily accessible. But I really appreciate the insight it provides me when I do make the effort. (And by effort, I’ll have you know that I delayed my coffee consumption by nearly four hours this morning which was absolute torture!!)
There are a number of other analysis tools via bioelectrical scan, hydrostatic weighing, etc., and I highly recommend seeking it out if you’re as interested in data and monitoring body composition changes as I am. Even infrequent analysis is worth it!
I wasn’t overly surprised by anything the data revealed, except for the fact that I am apparently shrinking. I’ve asserted that I’m a solid 5’7 despite knowing that I’m actually 5’6 ¾. However, today I was 5’6 ½. Geesh.
There are two main reasons I opted to get tested. First, I was curious about where my body fat percentage is currently sitting as I near the end of an anabolic state (building) or, in other words, trying to add some muscle mass to my frame before I switch to a catabolic phase.
The other reason is that I have deficiencies that I’m trying to resolve. For example, my right leg has more muscle mass than my left leg, which is visually apparent (and not ideal when symmetry is important for my sport), and I’ve been working to create more balance. My efforts seem to be helping so that was good news.
(Today’s analysis did reveal that my arms are pretty imbalanced too, which I wasn’t aware of. My right arm is significantly smaller than my left. Dang, I’m lopsided! Lol.)
My intention in sharing all of this is to let you know that there are so many ways to observe our progress when we are striving towards making changes. And oftentimes, the best results are ones that we have the most difficulty “seeing” in ourselves.
Also, I am now offering a year-long coaching package! If you would benefit from having long-term support to help you navigate your personal nutrition needs, and accountability completely customized to you, check out the details via the link below.
The investment is your declaration that you are ready to take radical responsibility for your health and wellbeing and I’d be honored to take the journey with you.
Information about the package can be found on my Functional Nutrition page. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions!
It would be a disservice to you to offer a special deal on my coaching services just because it’s Black Friday, Shop Small Saturday, or Cyber Monday.
(And for Pete’s sake, can we throw in a No Spend Sunday to give our wallets a break?)
When something is “on sale,” it drives us to purchase because it’s a good deal even if it’s not something we need or truly even want.
My desire is that people purchase my services because they are ready to change the trajectory of their health and well-being. Not because they are on special, discounted, or otherwise reduced.
And while the price points of my coaching offers are modest, the investment is a part of the activation. The investment is intended to be a declaration. (Read that again.) The declaration is that you are serious about what you say you want whether it’s to lose weight/reduce body fat, add some muscle, fine-tune your selection of food choices to optimize your vitality or assist you in achieving a performance-based goal.
I have, and will probably again in the future, offer bundle pricing, early-bird offers, and reduced pricing on packages but not because I’m trying to attract clients for the sake of attracting clients.
Yes, my coaching is my livelihood and I earn my living from this work that I offer. However, I uphold a high level of integrity around how I earn and operate as a business owner. I’m not here to sell. I’m here to serve.
I want my clients to have an extraordinary experience working with me and achieve whatever it is they seek through our work together. Therefore, I’m only interested in working with clients who are ready to work, not show up half-ass because they bought a package at some percentage off or discounted rate simply because it was a bargain.
On a side note, I do make special accommodations for clients that need to split payments. I am also open to having a conversation about alternate levels of support that might better suit a client’s current needs and financial situation. If you feel called to that, please reach out and ask me. There is ALWAYS an option if you feel called to take responsibility.
All of my current packages for one-to-one nutrition coaching can be found under the Services tab on my homepage labeled Functional Nutrition.
If you know, deep in the core of your being, that you are ready to make some radical changes and you believe that I’m the right person to support and guide you, the links to payment are provided. If you need more information or want to talk through what you need, let’s schedule a phone call to chat. All of the options to connect with me are on the Contact page.
My Aligned Activation workshops, which address topics and themes to help support people in achieving their goals, are priced to be accessible to anyone looking for a deeper conversation around troubleshooting challenges. In fact, my December workshop on December 7, 2021, Service to Self, is FREE! All you need to do to attend is provide your email address so I can send you the link to participate. There will be the ability to watch the replay if you can’t make the live transmission. (Email submission form below.)
I’ll love you into your power if you’ll allow me the honor.
If you’ve been following along recently, I’ve been going through a bit of a death cycle and trying to realign to my purpose. It’s been a bit wild.
I’ve had a number of people reach out asking if I’m no longer going to provide nutrition coaching services over the past couple of weeks. I’ve spent a lot of time analyzing and pondering and contemplating and doing the deep inner work to see if I can reconnect to the passion and drive that led me to want to work in the nutrition field in the first place.
What I’ve discovered, even though I don’t have all of the answers right now, is that I do know I’ve been gifted with the wisdom and experiential knowledge related to nutrition for a reason. More so, I know that I want to help people experience peace with their bodies and move through life feeling a sense of vigor that is obtainable by eating well. I want to help people navigate their nutritional needs and achieve their goals. I want us all, collectively, to experience a connection to our food and to understand the basics of how our bodies use the foods we consume because we literally “are what we eat.”
That’s all to say that I’m not planning to stop coaching anytime soon. But that’s not what I’m hoping on here to share.
My intention for this post is to address some stuff I’ve seen come up for a lot of people this week around the holiday and the consumption of the foods we associate with it. I want to offer a couple of pieces of guidance to help you experience enjoyment and peace while celebrating Thanksgiving, not stress or worry about some overindulgence or that eating a little outside your normal protocol will destroy any progress you’ve made or cause you to completely come off the rails, so to speak.
First of all, it’s a holiDAY. One day out of 365 days. One day, once a year, over a lifetime. Not your last day on earth.
One day of indulging in the abundance of the season while celebrating all that we have to celebrate with our family or friends, in our cozy, warm homes, with clothes on our backs, and being surrounded by love, laughter, and memories in the making. (In the grand scheme of things, we should be celebrating like that all 365 days!)
What I see happen is that within the moment, we make choices to indulge a little, but then, if we eat more than our bodies can handle or are accustomed to – if we eat things we know our bodies don’t thrive on – it tends to revolt a little.
We FEEL icky physically. Our bellies are literally stuffed and we might experience some GI distress… bloating, gas, heartburn… Uncomfortable perhaps but not the end of the world.
However, what happens is that we start to have FEELINGS about how we FEEL physically. They compound. And before we know it, we’re beating ourselves up for overeating or being careless or making the choices that we felt compelled to make in the midst of merriment.
The trick here is to disassociate how we physically feel with the feelings that arise as a result.
You can experience the physical feelings of discomfort without spiraling into a vortex of negative self-talk or worse, forcing upon yourself some form of punishment like not eating the next day or convincing yourself that you need to go run for three hours to burn it all off.
The second piece to that is to put a positive spin on your choices. You’ve flooded your body with nutrients! Because even pumpkin pie has some nutritional value. You’ve provided your body with fuel! The day after Thanksgiving, you’re going to be running on all cylinders. Trust me! You’ll have ample energy to hit Black Friday sales, hit the gym to put those extra calories to work (using excess calories as fuel to build muscle is not the same as punishing yourself by slogging through hours of exercise out of shame or guilt), or spend the day decking the halls putting Clark Griswold to shame. And, as I’ve already implied, you made memories with your loved ones. That’s nourishment for your soul!
My second suggestion, that I’ll share from my own experience in relation to the actual food element is this: you are not obligated to eat it all and especially if you don’t love it or you know that certain foods do not feel good to your system.
For most of my life, Thanksgiving was my least favorite holiday. I love food. But I don’t love turkey. I don’t like mashed potatoes and gravy at all. I really don’t like stuffing or dressing. And I don’t care for pie either.
However, I’d force myself to eat it all because it was there and that’s what we do to express our gratitude for the harvest, right?
A few years ago, I realized why I didn’t enjoy the holiday and decided to start making some of my own dishes that I would enjoy much better. (I’ll take the opportunity to plug my Aligned Activation workshop, Service to Self, because this is the perfect example! Also, I don’t have a webpage with details yet but it will be on Tuesday, December 7, 2021, at 4:44 PST and it is FREE!! You can sign up via this previousblog post.) I make a little extra to share but most of the time I am the only one that eats it. And that is okay! I get so much pleasure from eating the things that I really love and enjoy. It’s completely changed Thanksgiving for me!
And that leads to my final suggestion. Be intentional about your choices and savor every single mouthful. Remember, it’s one day. Not our last day. We don’t have to shovel it in as though it’s our last ever opportunity to indulge a little.
Indulgence should be special. It should be outside of the ordinary; outside of our normal dietary profile. And it should be enjoyed immensely. So be intentional about your choices and be intentional about your consumption of them.
I know there is a tendency to feel the need to “get back on track” following a holiday (or vacation or a period of stress when we might deviate from better nutritional habits) but one of the coaching strategies I employ is helping my clients create space within their plans to not only indulge but to do so deliberately so they don’t feel they’ve gone off the trails and need to get back on.
Enjoying holidays, and birthdays, and celebrations can and should be part of your plan in working towards nutrition and health goals. Otherwise, it’s not sustainable.
If you’re looking for this kind of guidance and support and feel I might be a good fit to help you succeed in achieving your goals, please reach out. Let’s chat!
I wish you a meaningful and memory-filled Thanksgiving!
Look at your key ring. Do you have a single key that provides you entry to every lock you could ever possibly need to gain access to?
Chances are, probably not.
You need a key to unlock your front door. A separate key to unlock each of your vehicles. Perhaps you need a key to open your mailbox or a key to enter a storage unit. I’ve seen key rings with a dozen (or more!) keys on them.
I know this will be a super unpopular opinion, but I really think “consistency” is over-glorified. If being consistent is THE key, what is the key to being consistent?
My belief is that there are a number of keys we need on our journey to achieve a desired outcome or goal and I will likely provide my thoughts on more of them at a later date. Today, however, I will focus on one of the keys that I feel is really overlooked and imperative to success in endeavors of achievement:
In conversations with clients this past week around planning for Thanksgiving, I’ve listened to a number of people share concerns about how to navigate the holiday. They’ve expressed worry that their efforts or any progress they’ve achieved will be derailed. (Therefore, this post is relaying the message in the context of dietary protocols with specific body composition goals in mind but it can be applied to everything.)
First and foremost, I really believe that enjoying a holiday by spending time with loved ones and savoring a thoughtfully prepared meal and some seasonal treats is imperative to a balanced relationship with food and enjoyment of the holiday season in general.
But I know for some, a day off plan will be challenging. What I’ve proposed to those I’ve talked with that are feeling stress or fear around altering their course to accommodate holiday meals (because, hello! Inconsistency.) is to let go of the need to be consistent and focus rather on being resilient.
Resilience is the ability to withstand challenges and the capacity to quickly recover from difficult situations. It implies a tough will of character and an aptitude for flexibility.
We can’t control every single aspect of our lives. But we can control how we adapt to them and bounce back from them. We cannot be 100% consistent in everything we do 100% of the time. It’s just not possible. We can, however, enter into a state of resiliency by focusing on the things we are doing that are in support of or in favor of the desired outcome.
My suggestion is that instead of fixating on the things that perhaps highlight inconsistencies, note all the ways in which you are flexing your resiliency. Write them down if you need to be reminded! Consistency, by the way, is simply conformity to an application or process.
You are stronger and more resilient than any of the challenging circumstances you face.
I was recently asked to explain what Aligned Activation is. As in, verbally offer an explanation during a face-to-face conversation. And I fumbled to find the right words to adequately provide the depths of what it is. Because honestly, although I coined the term more than a year ago, I’ve only really recently had the full concept of Aligned Activation land within my system and I’m still processing what it means and what it looks like.
(True to form, there were a LOT of hand gestures during that conversation though!)
What I initially thought Aligned Activation to be was simply a set of actions that were in alignment with one’s goals. “A marriage of desire, mindset, and actionable strategies,” I wrote on my website.
It is that. But it’s also bigger than that.
And I’m still trying to find the words; a way to cohesively string together and conceptualize the deeper meaning of what it is, how it works, and how it can profoundly impact the people who choose to be in my field.
The best I can offer right now is this: Aligned Activation is a three-part process that encompasses activation, action, and actualization. They are aligned (as in positioned) but nonlinear, however. Activation and actualization orbit around actions that are the nucleus of the entirety. Activation precedes both action and actualization. Actualization begins with activation but is intertwined throughout the other stages.
It’s simple yet so complex.
In a nutshell, actualization begins when you become activated by envisioning the fulfilled goal or desired outcome. It’s reverse engineering in a sense. When you become excited or energized about something that you aspire to obtain and set that vision into motion through action, it will be created. It will materialize.
I know. It’s a lot to digest.
But I’m deeply honored to have been imparted with this wisdom I’ve been gifted with and intend to use it to help impact others who feel called to explore it deeper with me.
My monthly Aligned Activation workshops (including my December workshop which is FREE! You can join via the form below!) are intended to dive into topics and concepts that help create clarification around alignment.
I’m channeling how I might offer this in terms of 1:1 coaching so stay tuned if that is something you might be interested in.